Take it up the Brum!Team line-up: McMecken, Howard, Harris, Higgins (75), Seecharan N (45), Perrett, Slater, Jelbert, Barrett, Davies, Galagher, Utting (45), Tett (75).
On a not that wet, not that windy, not that sunny afternoon, the Big C’s faced a Birmingham United team who were fresh from their best run of the season, a hatrick of muggings, a brace of car thefts and a burglary all on Friday night showing the blues really are returning to form.
In a refreshing change the Canaries actually had men on the bench and didn’t have to assure an unsuspecting Tom Morely that the blisters really were worth it. Utting and Tettley, not that fresh from their trip to Thailand, chose to stand next to, rather than sit on the bench, blaming one too many nights of ping pong; "Keeps" seemed particularly sympathetic. Perrett, sporting a strange meatloaf like growth all over his face demanded his team start like a Bat out of Hell, he then knelt down and carried on polishing his platinum plimsoles.
The canaries wrestled hard to gain control of the first 30 mins, a few promising balls played forward by the yellow banded Barney McEnroe and some nicely floated balls from Harris and Seech gave messers Gappeo, Davieseo and Galagherinho meat to chew on, but sadly no goal. Minutes later good work from the midfield gave Galagher another chance to run at the defense, he gladly obliged but to the dismay of the crowd the recently self proclaimed goal provider took things a little too far, squaring the ball for….no one.
With a goalless first half looking even more likely than another sad intra-canary criticism, the lack of a very debatable offside decision allowed the half decent numero neuf to finish his earl grey, establish the ref had chosen not to blow for the obvious, and stride forward to lob a helpless Keeps.
Halftime 1:0.
A concise, positive and clearly constructed team talk banished thoughts of any more in-house moaning and immediately left the intelligent, degree bearing Norfolkonians itching to put things right. Their start could not have been better. A 14 pass move from the kick off gave an indication of what was to come, moments later Davies laid the ball back to Jelbert who stroked it out wide to the onrushing and slightly sore substitute Utting, he drilled the ball across the box and gleefully watched Matt Upson’s shorter fatter brother stab the ball home. Utting claimed the goal.
The Yellow defense, led by the fit again Higgins, continued stifling the occasional Birmingham attacks with Keeps managing to maintain concentration by pretending he was writing his next squash match report. Howard’s solid defending was complemented by a few ‘lets go mental’ runs spanning half the length of the pitch. Inspired by this Jelbert played a neat one two with the heavily tanned Utting and flew down the wing definitely keeping the ball inside the sideline, a deliberately third rate cross rebounded back to Gappy who unsurprisingly let fly with a rasping shot into the bottom left of the goal. As his team mates rushed to congratulate him signs that his recent leap to fame were causing mental anger management issues were confirmed when he pulled his shirt over his head, hoping no one would notice him, when they did, he unloaded a barrel of unpleasant swear words in quick succession.
With Perrett continuingly whipping in dangerous corners and Tett now on the field and showcasing his usual good touches and clever distribution, not to mention his post-Thailand John Wayne-like run, things looked back on track for the yellows. After a strange anatomy lesson assuring followers that your head is somewhere between the calf and the heel, the final moments can only be described in a rhyme;
Fulltime 2:2
MoTM: Jelbert
On a not that wet, not that windy, not that sunny afternoon, the Big C’s faced a Birmingham United team who were fresh from their best run of the season, a hatrick of muggings, a brace of car thefts and a burglary all on Friday night showing the blues really are returning to form.
In a refreshing change the Canaries actually had men on the bench and didn’t have to assure an unsuspecting Tom Morely that the blisters really were worth it. Utting and Tettley, not that fresh from their trip to Thailand, chose to stand next to, rather than sit on the bench, blaming one too many nights of ping pong; "Keeps" seemed particularly sympathetic. Perrett, sporting a strange meatloaf like growth all over his face demanded his team start like a Bat out of Hell, he then knelt down and carried on polishing his platinum plimsoles.
The canaries wrestled hard to gain control of the first 30 mins, a few promising balls played forward by the yellow banded Barney McEnroe and some nicely floated balls from Harris and Seech gave messers Gappeo, Davieseo and Galagherinho meat to chew on, but sadly no goal. Minutes later good work from the midfield gave Galagher another chance to run at the defense, he gladly obliged but to the dismay of the crowd the recently self proclaimed goal provider took things a little too far, squaring the ball for….no one.
With a goalless first half looking even more likely than another sad intra-canary criticism, the lack of a very debatable offside decision allowed the half decent numero neuf to finish his earl grey, establish the ref had chosen not to blow for the obvious, and stride forward to lob a helpless Keeps.
Halftime 1:0.
A concise, positive and clearly constructed team talk banished thoughts of any more in-house moaning and immediately left the intelligent, degree bearing Norfolkonians itching to put things right. Their start could not have been better. A 14 pass move from the kick off gave an indication of what was to come, moments later Davies laid the ball back to Jelbert who stroked it out wide to the onrushing and slightly sore substitute Utting, he drilled the ball across the box and gleefully watched Matt Upson’s shorter fatter brother stab the ball home. Utting claimed the goal.
The Yellow defense, led by the fit again Higgins, continued stifling the occasional Birmingham attacks with Keeps managing to maintain concentration by pretending he was writing his next squash match report. Howard’s solid defending was complemented by a few ‘lets go mental’ runs spanning half the length of the pitch. Inspired by this Jelbert played a neat one two with the heavily tanned Utting and flew down the wing definitely keeping the ball inside the sideline, a deliberately third rate cross rebounded back to Gappy who unsurprisingly let fly with a rasping shot into the bottom left of the goal. As his team mates rushed to congratulate him signs that his recent leap to fame were causing mental anger management issues were confirmed when he pulled his shirt over his head, hoping no one would notice him, when they did, he unloaded a barrel of unpleasant swear words in quick succession.
With Perrett continuingly whipping in dangerous corners and Tett now on the field and showcasing his usual good touches and clever distribution, not to mention his post-Thailand John Wayne-like run, things looked back on track for the yellows. After a strange anatomy lesson assuring followers that your head is somewhere between the calf and the heel, the final moments can only be described in a rhyme;
With the minutes ticking down, and the Canaries hunger eating up the ground,
The yellows were rightly playing out the game, their defense looking sound,
A final kick forward by the girls in blue, saw a collective casual trot from the midland so rubbishest crew.
Perrett swung, deliberately missing with a wild punt, and the ref gave his final decision of the day confirming he was an absolute……fool.
The last minute equaliser ensured the Canaries left the field in a dejected manner, the final chant of ‘bring back the gay ref’ summed up their afternoon.
The yellows were rightly playing out the game, their defense looking sound,
A final kick forward by the girls in blue, saw a collective casual trot from the midland so rubbishest crew.
Perrett swung, deliberately missing with a wild punt, and the ref gave his final decision of the day confirming he was an absolute……fool.
The last minute equaliser ensured the Canaries left the field in a dejected manner, the final chant of ‘bring back the gay ref’ summed up their afternoon.
Fulltime 2:2
MoTM: Jelbert
2 comments:
Actually i don't have a degree. But i didn't want to mention it and ruin the gaffers half time rant or more likely, be immediately subbed. I appologise for my lack of education and the total shame i have bought on the club. However i will stay anonymous and hope there is no need for a witch hunt.
don't worry, i know who you are .. and you're secret's safe with me.. for now.
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